a few impressions from the field….
my ghetto dorm/hostile lodgings at fort sam look like a four seasons hotel after sleeping in a tent for 9 days
on day one, I was dirtier than I have been without the chance to clean up – day one! and we weren’t able to take our one and only shower until yesterday. I never want to smell myself again. crawling around in the mud and dirt and grass is just fine if you have more than a baby wipe waiting at the end of the day.
my new friend, charleene, goes with me everywhere, even the latrine (aka port-a-potty). she’s an M-16 rifle. we have a love/hate relationship. I love to shoot her, but I don’t want to carry her around all the time. I also have an LBE (load bearing equipment) and a gas mask I carry with me at all times. the whole package weighs about 25 lbs.
MRE’s are handy, but baaaaad for you! I am alarmed by how many men here are planning to buy a case and live off them from now on. they seem to think MRE’s are better than veggies and fish, and fruit. don’t get me wrong, if I had a bunker, I’d be loading it up with MRE’s. but guess what? Armageddon is not looming...
I’ll be back with more in 3 days. let’s hope I survive….
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Sunday, August 17, 2008
a pink flamingo in the desert
haven't posted in a few days, although i have started several. i'm trying! by the time i get home from class, i want to a) take shower, b) eat, c) sleep (not necessarily in that order). in about 4 hours (2 am), i report for monday's adventures. we start field exercises (FTX) tomorrow, a training that is supposed to simulate a deployment environment (HA!). we'll be out at camp bullis for 12 days, then they allow us Labor Day weekend off, and we return to bullis for another week after that. i think it's mostly an exercise in deprivation, roughing it, having to do without showers, toilets, cell phones, and computers. the plan is to have us crawling through dirt, packing a rucksack ("ruck marching"), setting up camps and clinics for those of us who are medics, getting comfortable with weapons, and learning how to convoy.
the prospect is stressing me out! i just want to get it over with. i also know that although it won't be the most comfortable situation for me, the soldiers in Iraq and those who train for the field regularly, are roughing it WAAAAYYY more than we will be. this is nothing compared to the reality, it's just a taste. i've talked to a few people in my class who have been deployed as combat medics, and i think this FTX is almost an insult to their skills. the people (such as my roomie) who were enlisted before becoming an officer have experienced more training and hardship than OBCL has to offer, but somehow, that isn't easing my worries. 2 words: obstacle course... OK, here's another two --- brown recluse spiders (i know, that was three words...). i can deal with the whole "no shower" situation, i can live through the filthy sweaty messiness, but the physical challenges are the source of the freak out. climbing a wall? climbing up a rope with my arms alone? a PhD in psychology does not prepare one for this.... i've packed so much crap, i'd like to think i will be able to handle any unforseen unpleasantness (my feet rotting off, snake bites, chiggers, infection, dehydration, sunburn, what else could there possible be?). my ruck weighs a ton, i hope i can offload a bunch of stuff in the tent.
the heat has been incredible this week, which is a concern as well. if it's 100 degrees in san antonio, it's 110 at camp bullis. but i guess there are severe thunderstorms heading this way, and i'm not sure if that's better or worse. flash flooding or sunburn? tough call.... crawling through mud, or dust? hot & sweaty or damp and moldy? eww! i'm only bringing 2 uniforms, so be glad that you all don't have to be around me for the next 2 weeks! i've got a big bottle of febreeze, and will be using it liberally.
i must get whatever beauty sleep i can... i think it's gonna be a long monday. i'll be sure to take a ton of pictures, and post them when i get back... love you all!
the prospect is stressing me out! i just want to get it over with. i also know that although it won't be the most comfortable situation for me, the soldiers in Iraq and those who train for the field regularly, are roughing it WAAAAYYY more than we will be. this is nothing compared to the reality, it's just a taste. i've talked to a few people in my class who have been deployed as combat medics, and i think this FTX is almost an insult to their skills. the people (such as my roomie) who were enlisted before becoming an officer have experienced more training and hardship than OBCL has to offer, but somehow, that isn't easing my worries. 2 words: obstacle course... OK, here's another two --- brown recluse spiders (i know, that was three words...). i can deal with the whole "no shower" situation, i can live through the filthy sweaty messiness, but the physical challenges are the source of the freak out. climbing a wall? climbing up a rope with my arms alone? a PhD in psychology does not prepare one for this.... i've packed so much crap, i'd like to think i will be able to handle any unforseen unpleasantness (my feet rotting off, snake bites, chiggers, infection, dehydration, sunburn, what else could there possible be?). my ruck weighs a ton, i hope i can offload a bunch of stuff in the tent.
the heat has been incredible this week, which is a concern as well. if it's 100 degrees in san antonio, it's 110 at camp bullis. but i guess there are severe thunderstorms heading this way, and i'm not sure if that's better or worse. flash flooding or sunburn? tough call.... crawling through mud, or dust? hot & sweaty or damp and moldy? eww! i'm only bringing 2 uniforms, so be glad that you all don't have to be around me for the next 2 weeks! i've got a big bottle of febreeze, and will be using it liberally.
i must get whatever beauty sleep i can... i think it's gonna be a long monday. i'll be sure to take a ton of pictures, and post them when i get back... love you all!
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
it's good to be an "A"
alphabetical order is truly the marker of an advanced civilization. . . you may think it's sliced bread, toe nail polish, or bio-diesel -- but those things get you nowhere in a line of 400 people. no, being an Agnor does! i must pause and recognize that the alphabet is an organizational jewel -- the one thing that is working out for me here. the Warman's would be in the back of the bus, sad to say. most of my new friends are A's and B's, we in the first 2 letters of the alphabet have to stick together in the 1st platoon. that's right - 1st! it's better to be first.... that's what I repeat to myself during the PT run, but somehow, it doesn't make my legs move any faster.
anyway, I'll be going out to the field next Monday for field exercises, and yesterday, all 400 of us had to stand in line to get our TA-50 gear (which apparently was issued during the Vietnam War, too - my roomie assures me the mustard gas has been washed out by now). being an A was a big payoff, as we were in line first, and got 3 hours of free time when everyone else was still standing in line. Hahaha! that evil laugh goes out to my roomie, who's at the end of the alphabet. I'm slightly terrified to go out in the field. I'm trying not be too girlie and have been trying to talk myself into just rolling with it... one shower every 5 or 7 days, 105 degree weather + humidity, tramping around in the Texan wilderness-- it's just not my usual cup 'o tea. BUT I do get to complete weapons certification with an M-16 and pistol (yee-haw!) and learn some combatives stuff - there are several people I would like to throw down at this point. I have been encouraged by those in leadership positions to sneak in contraband, like my cell phone and "pogey bag" (munchies - you all know I must have my snacks), and I am taking their advice to heart. maybe the food will soothe me while i lay awake at night, vigilantly guarding my tasty toes from the predatory brown recluse spiders (eeeee!!). I'd rather deal with the rattlers and scorpions, any day. as long as i go into it thinking "this will be just like the worst camping trip you've ever been on," i'll be fine. how's that for a reframe, my therapist friends?
anyway, I'll be going out to the field next Monday for field exercises, and yesterday, all 400 of us had to stand in line to get our TA-50 gear (which apparently was issued during the Vietnam War, too - my roomie assures me the mustard gas has been washed out by now). being an A was a big payoff, as we were in line first, and got 3 hours of free time when everyone else was still standing in line. Hahaha! that evil laugh goes out to my roomie, who's at the end of the alphabet. I'm slightly terrified to go out in the field. I'm trying not be too girlie and have been trying to talk myself into just rolling with it... one shower every 5 or 7 days, 105 degree weather + humidity, tramping around in the Texan wilderness-- it's just not my usual cup 'o tea. BUT I do get to complete weapons certification with an M-16 and pistol (yee-haw!) and learn some combatives stuff - there are several people I would like to throw down at this point. I have been encouraged by those in leadership positions to sneak in contraband, like my cell phone and "pogey bag" (munchies - you all know I must have my snacks), and I am taking their advice to heart. maybe the food will soothe me while i lay awake at night, vigilantly guarding my tasty toes from the predatory brown recluse spiders (eeeee!!). I'd rather deal with the rattlers and scorpions, any day. as long as i go into it thinking "this will be just like the worst camping trip you've ever been on," i'll be fine. how's that for a reframe, my therapist friends?
Saturday, August 9, 2008
running around
DAY FIVE
Went on first ever "battalion run" this morning. one would assume the Army would be the epitome of organization and efficiency. sadly, not true! we were told to be there at 0430, which always means 15 minutes before that I learned the hard way, and we didn't start running till 0530! by then, my banana breakfast had fizzled out. so much time is wasted standing around, waiting for something to happen. it's a repeat offense around here... the infuriating part is that I have to be on time (i.e. 15 min. early) EVERYWHERE I go, due to a process called "accountability." it's a fancy term for "role call," which I haven't had to participate in since freshman year of college. believe me, know one wants to not be there-- we have three people in our platoon who are never there on time -- group punishment should be a powerful motivator! we have to show up earlier and earlier every time someone is late.
at least the officers in charge provided us with an Army-approved aerobic mix over the loudspeakers while we were waiting around before the run-- the mix includes such delightful tunes as "eye of the tiger," "the macarena," "who let the dogs out," "caught up," (usher) and the Army commercial theme music (you know, the one that makes you want to jump out of a helicopter with an M-16 in your hand). it was a surreal experience-- i was expecting someone to bust out into a jazzercise routine. oh, and THEN, we had to listen to a skit about the dangers of drinking and driving, put on by some of the kiddies in basic training. hey, why didn't anyone tell me there was Drama Club?? the public service announcements at 5 am are SO unnecessary.
ps- running in a group of 400 people who are trying to maintain the same pace is HARD. it was like a human accordion, and for some reason, I was always in the sprinting section. and i thought the front was the rough place to be, but next time, i'll leave the middle of the group to someone else. every time i'd think i had a good pace going, the person in front of me would slow or stop, and i'd be fighting not to give 'em a big body hug from behind. i do love hugs though :-) just not sweaty icky hugs.
Went on first ever "battalion run" this morning. one would assume the Army would be the epitome of organization and efficiency. sadly, not true! we were told to be there at 0430, which always means 15 minutes before that I learned the hard way, and we didn't start running till 0530! by then, my banana breakfast had fizzled out. so much time is wasted standing around, waiting for something to happen. it's a repeat offense around here... the infuriating part is that I have to be on time (i.e. 15 min. early) EVERYWHERE I go, due to a process called "accountability." it's a fancy term for "role call," which I haven't had to participate in since freshman year of college. believe me, know one wants to not be there-- we have three people in our platoon who are never there on time -- group punishment should be a powerful motivator! we have to show up earlier and earlier every time someone is late.
at least the officers in charge provided us with an Army-approved aerobic mix over the loudspeakers while we were waiting around before the run-- the mix includes such delightful tunes as "eye of the tiger," "the macarena," "who let the dogs out," "caught up," (usher) and the Army commercial theme music (you know, the one that makes you want to jump out of a helicopter with an M-16 in your hand). it was a surreal experience-- i was expecting someone to bust out into a jazzercise routine. oh, and THEN, we had to listen to a skit about the dangers of drinking and driving, put on by some of the kiddies in basic training. hey, why didn't anyone tell me there was Drama Club?? the public service announcements at 5 am are SO unnecessary.
ps- running in a group of 400 people who are trying to maintain the same pace is HARD. it was like a human accordion, and for some reason, I was always in the sprinting section. and i thought the front was the rough place to be, but next time, i'll leave the middle of the group to someone else. every time i'd think i had a good pace going, the person in front of me would slow or stop, and i'd be fighting not to give 'em a big body hug from behind. i do love hugs though :-) just not sweaty icky hugs.
welcome to my new army life
DAY THREE
hello good friends (or others with voyeuristic tendencies).
i have promised, perhaps unwisely, to keep up a blog of how this whole "Army" situation is going. usually, when i promise to call, email, text, or keep in contact in any way, I fail miserably. And you are still my friends anyway! it's a little bit like a Christmas miracle :)
It's the end of day 3, and I am still alive, still reasonably mentally stable, and have not gone AWOL (as one young lady did after day 2 - still haven't found her yet). I am in Texas, in the hella hot humidity and weather (85% and 90%, respectively), and have not killed or maimed any one up to this point. I have traipsed around in a HOT uniform -- ACU's, to the Army naive (as I was 2 days ago) -- marching, standing, running, etc. and have not expired. ps- the ACU "standards" indicate that I am not to put my hands in my pockets, push up the long sleeves, unzip the front, or do anything that would make it possible for me to look like I'm not sweating like a pig in ACU's.
I have been at OBCL (Officer's Basic Leadership Course) for four days, and have been thrown into a world in which I do not understand the language, am expected to have a degree of accountability even my parents didn't impress upon me, and most of all (my greatest fear in any situation) -- I have no IDEA how to wear my outfit! Even I know I should be humiliated when a Private (lowest ranking enlisted soldier) walks up and fastens a velcro flap that was hanging loose on my sleeve. maybe he just wanted to touch me...
My new hobby is shaping and shaving (yes, shaving...) my beret. It needs more exfoliating than my legs! If only I had that time to dedicate to shaving my legs... Every night, I get home, drench the black beret in the shower, stick it on my head in the shape it is "regulation" to wear it in. Then I take it off my now dripping head and let it dry overnight, after taking a disposable razor to the woolly fuzz on the surface. It still looks funky, and if one more person calls me "Chef Bouardee" (or however you spell it) or Luigee, I'm gonna give up and steal someone else's perfectly formed beret.
hello good friends (or others with voyeuristic tendencies).
i have promised, perhaps unwisely, to keep up a blog of how this whole "Army" situation is going. usually, when i promise to call, email, text, or keep in contact in any way, I fail miserably. And you are still my friends anyway! it's a little bit like a Christmas miracle :)
It's the end of day 3, and I am still alive, still reasonably mentally stable, and have not gone AWOL (as one young lady did after day 2 - still haven't found her yet). I am in Texas, in the hella hot humidity and weather (85% and 90%, respectively), and have not killed or maimed any one up to this point. I have traipsed around in a HOT uniform -- ACU's, to the Army naive (as I was 2 days ago) -- marching, standing, running, etc. and have not expired. ps- the ACU "standards" indicate that I am not to put my hands in my pockets, push up the long sleeves, unzip the front, or do anything that would make it possible for me to look like I'm not sweating like a pig in ACU's.
I have been at OBCL (Officer's Basic Leadership Course) for four days, and have been thrown into a world in which I do not understand the language, am expected to have a degree of accountability even my parents didn't impress upon me, and most of all (my greatest fear in any situation) -- I have no IDEA how to wear my outfit! Even I know I should be humiliated when a Private (lowest ranking enlisted soldier) walks up and fastens a velcro flap that was hanging loose on my sleeve. maybe he just wanted to touch me...
My new hobby is shaping and shaving (yes, shaving...) my beret. It needs more exfoliating than my legs! If only I had that time to dedicate to shaving my legs... Every night, I get home, drench the black beret in the shower, stick it on my head in the shape it is "regulation" to wear it in. Then I take it off my now dripping head and let it dry overnight, after taking a disposable razor to the woolly fuzz on the surface. It still looks funky, and if one more person calls me "Chef Bouardee" (or however you spell it) or Luigee, I'm gonna give up and steal someone else's perfectly formed beret.
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